Number 24 - Have a meaningful conversation with a stranger

During my trip travelling alone in Italy I was forced into situations outside of my comfort zone. There were times during my trip where I felt extremely lonely. And I’d like to share a personal story of mine with you. 

The first time was quite early on during my trip. It was week 2 and I’d just left Venice and moved on to my next stop in Verona. When I arrived at the train station I felt completely lost, I didn’t know which bus I needed to take or how to get to my hotel. Once I got on the right bus I then struggled with my bags in the cobbled streets. I felt really sad to leave Venice but dropped my bags off at the hotel and went to the rooftop for a drink.

The sun began to shine and the view was amazing. Two girls came and sat behind me. They were excited to order their cocktails and one turned to the other and said ‘finally let’s get a selfie with our drinks now the sun has come out.’ 

I don’t know what came over me but I turned back to them and said, ‘Or I could take the picture for you?! 

Verena from Germany and Nicole from the States were friends who worked together and met in Italy for a couple of weeks visiting Rome and Verona. We got chatting and they then invited me to join them for dinner and we had the best couple of evenings laughing and enjoying great food and company. It was so lovely to have met them and it made me feel so much better when I was feeling lonely. 

On the second night I shared my story with Nicole and Verena, my 35 at 35 list and how I had decided that I could travel alone if I wanted to. Nicole was due to turn 35 in the next month and it was so lovely to hear that I’d inspired her that she too could ‘take 35 by the balls too!’ And that meeting me on this trip was the highlight!

The second time I was halfway through my trip I found myself in the most beautiful and awe inspiring city of Roma. Filled with deep history and culture I was in my element. Soaking in all the sights, the Colosseum, Vatican City, Sistine Chapel, Trevi fountain and the Pantheon. Completely blown away by all the historical significance behind each one. 

During my trip in each city I visited I’d always leave my last day in each location completely free of any plans. A chance to just roam around the streets getting lost, relaxing in piazzas with a coffee, gelato or an Aperol spritz whilst watching the world go by (you can picture it right...bliss).

And it was on this day, my last one in Rome that I was overcome with a huge sense of loneliness. So consuming all I wanted to do was go back to my hotel and search for the next flight home. On my way back to the hotel, on one of the smallest little streets of Rome I stumbled across an entrance to a hotel with a sign for a rooftop bar overlooking the Trevi Fountain. And so I forced myself out of my comfort zone and decided to go in.

It was the smallest bar I’d seen with only 5 or 6 tables, but with the most amazing view over the fountain. I sat there a while and ordered a coffee whilst waiting for the tables at the front to become free as they were definitely the best spot. Coffee turned into wine and whilst I looked out to the view, I couldn’t help but think, ‘I wish I could have shared this moment with someone’ and once again was filled with the overwhelming sadness of being alone. 

In that exact moment, as I could feel my eyes filling with tears, the table next to me became free and a couple sat by me. They were from the states. They were browsing the cocktail menu and quizzing the waiter about the ingredients in a Aperol Spritz. The lady was asking the waiter whether she would like it or not and was so undecided as to what to do. 

And so I thought, right, this is your chance, be confident step out of your comfort zone. And so I turned to them and said, ‘if you’re in Italy the one thing you have to try if you haven’t before is an Aperol Spritz, whether you’ll like it or not, just try it!’ 

The next couple of hours that followed that evening were full of great conversation and laughter. 

Doug and Maribel Smith are from Fort Lauderdale -Florida and were traveling Italy on their honeymoon. And I truly believe in that moment of sadness and loneliness, the universe heard me and sent me two amazing humans that I could connect with. 

Not just that, I was the kind of person who would never strike up a conversation with a stranger, but for some reason that day I forced myself to be confident to do so. 

Doug and Maribel invited me to join them for dinner that evening too and I was lucky enough that our paths crossed again during our travels where we enjoyed dinner and wine together in Sorrento too. I may have started my trip alone, but it didn’t end that way!

Having the confidence to speak to them that night in Rome and step out of my comfort zone has lead to a beautiful new friendship, and I’ve even been lucky enough to have been able to visit them at their home in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. 

One thing I remember the most from that night in Roma, was when we were at dinner and some girls on the table next to us, also from the states were asking us about recommendations in Rome, and then asked, ‘how do you guys all know each other?’ And Doug replied, ‘oh we just met her a couple of hours ago, but I believe you have best friends all around the world and tonight we found her!’ He was right!

Whether it’s a smile, a hello or a meaningful conversation, be confident be kind, humans are wonderful and you never know who you could meet and what relationships you’ll form!